ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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