dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
