Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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