For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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