Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize