you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Randomize