I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
We had to coat check the pizza.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
i need some magic done to my vagina
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Randomize
