Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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