Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
