Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
