I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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