Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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