You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
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