nut hugger
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
