If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize