Sry I called you an 8
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
