Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
There are leaves in my underwear?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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