we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
zippers are such a cool invention
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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