apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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