I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize