perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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