where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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