After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
