i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
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