That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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