i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
