All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
