Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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