I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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