great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize