Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
