Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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