Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
