Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
