I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
