White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
are you so shy because you have an std?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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