You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
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We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
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DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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