help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
If I die, sorry about rent.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize