I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
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