Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
