I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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