think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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