well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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