East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
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