her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
