Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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