New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
