Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords

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(402): View more from Nebraska

giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.

Fav 57 4446 1177
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(810): View more from Michigan

woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.

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(313): View more from Michigan

Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"

Fav 41 15650 1623
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(714): View more from California

so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?

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(205): View more from Alabama

Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.

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(562): View more from California

Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.

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(626): View more from California

my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.

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