a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
