they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
what day is it and did you see me today?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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