You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
